New Zealand 2007
Sheepless is New Zealand – 08/27/07
Date of Memories:
August 26-27th, 2007
Kiwi Location of Schralpness:
Remarkables, a ski field with hike-to happiness!
Brainscanned Participants:
666, Woody, NZphotoslave, & Tuk.
Historical Weather Report:
Flat light, crap-ass day on the 26th, to a springlike delight on the 27th.
Analytical Analysis of Activities:
The trip was coming to an end and we were bound to have at least one ubercrap day right? Well, that was the 26th. One hike into the chutes, back in the car, and straight to the Dux Lux for pizza & beer. The point and shoot almost took a 70 footer if it wasn’t for Woody’s suberb ninja-like, pole tip to camera strap steeze.
On the following day, the conditions didn’t look too promising. The clouds covered the Remarks as I waited for my servant to produce my daily long black. However, the day ended up in a hoodie wearing, spring to winter condition, mashup fest of fun.
Music:
Concord Dawn – "Man for all Seasons" (NZ dnb)
Everyday wakeup call included this machine….
Woody needs another for the road…a 12 shot flat white cocktail
Being all coffee-buzzed, he jumped into a white-chocolate-mocha….
666 eyes an obstacle for the cameraman to miss….
Tuk shows us controlled steep skiing technique…
From that performance, I decided to traverse into a billygoat course…
You’ve got to make the most out of your run right?
Visual contact of billygoating ahead…
No cellphone zone….
Tuk finds an isolated bank of schralpness…
Goatin’ without Gotamas…
And a wind-packed carve out to pizza & beer…..
Ok, well maybe we hit up some coffee first…
Then, we made it to the Dux Lux…straight up chillin’
A little later…some sushi
And then for some Latin Mules, hell why not?
THE 27th of AUGUST, 2007:
"Hurry, get in the car….we’re going to get jumped"
Photoslave makes a cliche business call…
First run, a sunny patch of freshness needed to be killed….
…and NZphotographerdude made an open bowl carve…
Turkey is ready!
As we traversed over to Nobis, we found perfect, smooth, spring snow…
….it was then I realized that I brought the right skis for the day
Yep, the Moment Melee…
Ski patrol told us we were only allowed two runs to limit an overnight "trench freeze"
If the snow looks fun….to be honest, it was.
666 on the fun snow….having fun.
OMG, Kingswood Mid-Fat Karve!
666 finds a jump…
Yep, he’s smiling….
Good time for a walk…
NZphotoslave hucks ‘n’ tucks…
Now up above Diagonalator, old mate gets a technical itch.
I wish I could say that he bonked his head on that overhang, but he didn’t.
A sweet setup…
…to an epic SLASHER film
Buffed-out groomedness….
120mm’s carve just fine…
Old mate, can’t let a untouched visual be raped by anyone but himself on his local hill…
…yes, he actually hiked uphill for this…
Did I forget to mention the snow on the lower mountain?
A Kiwi front door quiver….
…and this is quiver’s view…not too bad.
On our way to Wanaka, I had to check out a mate’s property that just became available for rent…
Just some friendly spam for a friendly Kiwi family, perfect for a huge family or a group of families that are tired of hotels and want to relax…
Let just say this place is awesome. Situated between Arrowtown and Queenstown, on a hill, with views of Coronet, back of Cardrona, the Remarkables, and the Crown Range…check out their website at http://www.taramea-house.com
After that, we hit a Kiwi traffic jam on the way to Wanaka…
…to visit "air to cat-track" Hamish Acland. Patella gone, ACL gone, MCL gone, lower arm gone…but NOT HIS SMILE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Woody likes Wanaka Kabobs…
Well, time to leave New Zealand….
But not before some sick glacier shots….
The place even brings stoke as you leave….
…and straight to Tahoe for the second surgery on Mrs. 666′s ankle. The 4 hour surgery was a success. Another plate, some bigger screws, some bone putty, and re-alignment of cartilage, she’ll be walking in er…..3-4 months.
Props goes to Nzphotoslave for the hospitality and dnb. His Mrs. for all the good feeds and pink bedding. Woody for taking me skiing in the chutes. Tuk for mounting up the Melees in about 3 minutes. Casey from Moment. NZSKI.com. And of course, my lovely wife for agreeing to this trip. 
**************************************************
Until next time NZ!
Without Darkness There is No Light, NZ – 08/25/07
Darkened Daylight:
August 25th, 2007
Layer of Earth’s Core:
Remarkables & Coronet Peak, New Zealand
Human Experiments:
666, Woody, NZphotoslave, Tuk, Mulled Wine, and kiwi kids.
Weather:
Fine afternoon at Remarks, to Katrina style winds at Coronet
Today’s Gospel:
Concrete wind buffed pockets
Indie Electronica:
UNKLE – "Burn my shadow"
Obligatory Turxski shot…
Mmmmmmm Panama Esmeralda!
Which goes quite well with anything in here….
Human garbage disposal…
Hasn’t snowed in a while so the road is getting a bit scratchy…
Typical Kiwi Freeskier…
…complete with hat-free steeze….Gollum?
Good vert and smooth snow was the name of the day….
….especially when you have a private driver to take you to your next Lord of the Rings tour
OMG! Way Rad!
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee e!
"This is going to be deep mate"
…."these are the days dreams are made of mate"
Tussok carve to driver pickup to next adventure…
…and Darkness Awaits
Night Goggles? Check. Skinny skis? Check. Mulled Wine? Check. After Every Run? Check.
Such a nice view….too bad its disappearing fast.
Hurricane winds at the summit provided some sick powder pockets between the ice moguls…
ABSOLUTELY MASSIVE SUNSET CLIFF HUCK!!!!
…to a snow fence SlaSH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wow!
Packed Powder Carvenesssssssssssss!
….even the kiwi kids drink mulled wine with whipped cream…
Mmmmmmm….its cold out there.
However, that kid got so f-in wasted that he stole a cafeteria tray and headed outside for madness.
Its getting DARK!
I think we need more wine…
Boiling up magma in the distance…
Night Panda night carve…..
Woody sees someone representing his roots….
Now we’re getting trippy….
I think we need more wine….
Evil chair….
This kid was arrested at the bottom and sent to the drunk tank…
The night bump lines in here were just outstanding….maybe it was the wine? Not really sure.
Moment Carvenation Rulez….
The storm is now just DUMPING!
Snow machine night slap…..
Tuk gets into the action….night carve pimp daddy!
Time to stop with the mulled wine…..
Nzphotomulledwine gets the shot of the night
Oh YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SuPeR ExTr3ME CHute5 & P0w CarV35, NZ – 08/24/07
Date OF TeH XTremE:
August 24th, 2007
VeNUe:
Remarkables, New Zealand, in the Chutes of course.
Competitors:
666 & Woody.
Weather:
Sunny with some Happy Clouds
SYNoPSIS:
Flat tire to Flat White to Chutes
DNB MuZiK:
Klute – "Never Never"
Need new tire mate….
Once that was sorted, it was all jolly from there…
Our Red Bull XTREME EXTREM Xtrem Big Mountain One Run venue for two people……..
Good view of lake and mountain…
Pink skis and pink hat = stupid.
First run, 666 gets line points…
…and finds another one to try to beat Woody’s no hat/no hair bonus points.
The Venue – death on the right
Happy turns on the left…
Woody waits for the starting countdown…
….YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
666 couldn’t wait for his turn, so he made some turns…
Woody finds a nice patch of soft snow…
The rest of the run was too cut up to conitnue the contest, so we called it…
So we decided to explore a little…
This doesn’t look bad does it? Man, that 1cm of new a couple days ago was DEEP!
…..fun.
Contest results ———–
Tie.
Bye Bye.
Sexy Snow Skiing Scenics, NZ – 08/23/07
dDATE OF SEXY:
August 23th, 2007
LOCATION OF CONCEPTION
Remarkables, New Zealand….surprise, surprise, the Alta Chutes
PAYING CUSTOMERS:
666, NZphotoslave. Woody, & Tuk
WEATHER:
Some high cloud
SYNOPSIS:
Ski the chutes and take some sexy snow skiing scenics.
LOVE MUSIC:
Wham – "Wham Rap"
Tuk, from Japan, has no idea what is about to happen at the summit…
Ahhhh….OOOOOOOOh…..Kiwi-country
This guy hasn’t done this much hiking since there was a 50% off sale for cigarettes at the local BP…
On the way up, 666 decides to pull his groin…
And a scenic carve on the way back to the bootpack…
The Summit, the summit of love…..
Double cone was there to join us for support…
God this guy is smokin’ hot…
"You think I can set in an edge?"
Don’t think I’ll even try….
We really should do our stretching before we make our descent…
Woody’s calves were extremely tight, but we worked that out….
Kiwi powder day…
Woody grows some BALLS and launches into the fresh windBLOWN…
666 CATCHES some of Woody’s sloppy SECONDS…
Tuk quickly attempts to get the hell away from us….
But his form is TIGHT…
666 is DEEP within the MOMENT
Tuk gets his ASS rammed on this windlip…..
Super exposed upper FACE has been licked….
….by this gorgeous MODEL
So, we decide to SLAY ‘exterminator’….
And 666 POKES his way down…
NZphotoslave SLAVES some cold smoke….
Woody LAPPED this one up as well…..
Tuk finds his own HOLE….
Woody skipped a cigarette for another turn…
Photoslave creates a Canon-carve….
Nice view of the "short hike" access to the Alta Chutes…
Tuk SPERMS his way to an untouched snow field…
And makes it look fun…
I think Photoslave has a better camera…..
Woody is HARDUP on skiing more and more powder….
He received some white stuff to the face….
We almost fell into a sticky situation….
666 lines up another…
Tuk decides to go SWITCH….
These guys work so well together…
The cameraman goes out for a clensing…
…and RECEIVES
The line – start from the summit on lookers right, make our way down to the central chute (exterminator), and FINISH at the lake…
Toilet Bowl session was calling our name….good view of Shadow Basin and the Alta Chutes…
Woody PICKED us UP at the bottom…
Scenic….
and to think that we all fell in love at the top of those peaks….
I wonder how these TR’s are actually made…immaculate conception? I don’t think so.
Later….
…
..
.
Did I really just do this TR?
1cm new of Cold Smoke Stoke – 08/22/07
SKIING DAY:
August 22th, 2007
PLACE OF 1cm DUMP!:
Remarkables, New Zealand, South Island, Southern Hemisphere
MATES:
666, NZphotoslave.
WEATHER:
1cm of new P O W D U U U R!!!!!!!!!!! plus windblown pockets
SYNOPSIS:
Huge dump overnight…1cm, but considering its also the only place to receive any new snow, the skiing is going to be just spectacular.
BEATS:
SIMIAN MOBILE DISCO – "I Believe"
Up the road, no guard rails = no liability…
New Moment Melees freshly mounted……mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Some cloud, some scenics, some new snow…
Snow & Middle Earth….
First tracks on a deep day….1cm.
NZphotoman takes the first turns down Diagonalator…
And its buffed-out to the lake…
666 makes a slough appearance…
Alta Chute 1cm of new MADNESS!@!#@!#@$#$$
666 carving the Melees in a Kiwi chute…
Followed by taking a bite out of some Kiwi fruit…
Melees suck….
NzPhotoSlav3 hits up the moguls….
…and then into the NASTAR course
CHOCOLATE CHIP RAIN CARVE……….
666 still skiing that 1cm of new….
New Zealand guy from Queenstown skates the local pool…
…OMG YESSSSSS!
This is boring….
The Chutes get socked into a cloud but we still found endless untracked…of 1cm of new.
Kiwi-half-pipe…
Kiwi-Garage Ceiling Quiver….
Skiing 1cm of new gets me in the mood for Arrowtown lollies…
Even for 1cm, and afternoon cloud…today was ———————
End of transmission,
Thanks to Nzphotoslave’s massive wifi network, photoshopping skillz, and the endless Peets Long Blacks to make this TR happen…
Next TR – Remarks session from the summit of the Remarkable Range…
Ohau Windy It Was in NZ – 08/21/07
Day in Southern Hemisphere:
August 21st, 2007
Location of wind and snow:
Ohau, New Zealand
Coffee Nerds:
666, NZphotoslave, and Woody
Weather:
Wind that pushes snow over an existing base of layered snow, some sun, some cloud.
Synopsis:
6:20 AM wakeup call, diesel, coffee, donut, bottled Red-Bull, another flat white in Omarama, arrive at Ohau, hike, hike in wind, do a recon hike, ski, make more laps on chairlift, leave, and drive back to Queenstown to get a proper feed.
Music that makes one think:
Tay Zonday – "Chocolate Rain"
Its pretty early to be evil…
Tip for new visitors, don’t drive off the road…
I hate crowds and bad views…
Yes, they take credit cards…
Ahhhhhh, best friends 4 ever!
Let’s go for a walk…its actually a nice temperature outside
Wicked view off the top…actually its just a postcard in front of the camera lens
Wait a minute, do you feel that? Yep, this hike is going to suck.
The ridge down there is the looker’s right hike-to terrain that just needed a bit more snow…massive potential though.
Woody sheds a tear…
We made it to Hemi’s (sp) basin…with just a little bit more snow, a boot-pack would have been in order.
But not without a short break for a biscuit and some tea…
Woody looks for a line…
Sharks littered the gnarly stuff, so I just rallied down the gut of this thing…
Photoslave gets some freshly buffed goodness….
And remember, there’s only about 9 people at Ohau on this day, with none hiking anywhere near us…
Woody attempts a "schmear" turn on a sunny patch…
Winter snow is always FUN!
No moguls here…just like Squaw!
One of the hidden gems of magical Ohau…
On the way down, we find a protected pitch…
Without any tracks…
Who is this guy?
"So I was thinking. I think that if I ski over that rock, I’ll get airborn"
E X T R E M E ! ! ! ! ! !
S U P E R – E X T R E M E !
666 heading to the cafe, for another flat-white…
A G G R E S S I V E ! ! ! ! !
A L P I N E – S K I I N G!
Its weird how the light only hit the skis?
"Ok, last one to take their boots off buys the Speights"
The traffic on the way down was just out of hand….never again 
Next up, another day at the Remarks….yay!
Triple Fun Ski Day at the Remarks – 08/20/07
DATE OF SNOW SKIING:
August 20th, 2007
LOCATION OF BLUEBIRD MADNESS:
Remarkables, New Zealand, land of the long white cloud.
ATHLETES slash TALENT:
666, NZphotoSLAVE
DEGREE OF BLUEBIRD AND LACK OF CLOUD:
99.9%
SYNOPSIS:
Pick up freshly tuned skis from our personal Japanese ski tuner, grab a coffee, egg panini, hike Alta Chutes all day, say wassup to Brad Holmes, and have a Powerade with superstar Subaru NZ extreme Hamish Acland.
MUSIC TO NOD HEAD BY:
Digitalism – "Pogo"
Pre-bluebird snack…
“Why is nobody up here….HA HA HA LOL”
Some snowcat work where Travis Rice is rumored to hit some massive kicker.
First turn of the mornin’…
Old mate finds some uncompressed powder…
666 scopes a line…
….and decides on a blind slough landing
Kiwi skier skiing down Kiwi snow…
…and migrates south to find some more sugar supplement.
The area we were forced to work with, and why we were so bored.
Should we go up for another…why not? Here’s proof:
The bottom of the run was too soft….but the Moment M1’s sliced and diced.
Next up, NZfototaker takes a run in Telex…
SKIING IS FUN!
Telex mid-chute below….retro black & white style
iPhone call to wife…
iPhone pow carve…
Pipeline is next on the list….Photoman makes a turn.
RAD!
…and he exists out the bottom
How about some exposed turns on Diagonalator?
And a carve to finish off the day…
Gratuitous Moment Skis random non-ski related but sort of ski related shot …
New Zealand is scenic…
Red Remarks…
…and a domestic cat with a nice view
Ohau TR to follow…bye bye
A Ski Blog of New Zealand Skiing – 08/19/07
Date: August 19, 2007
Location: Remarkables ski field on the island country of New Zealand.
Skiers: 666, NZPhotoslave, Woody, and Campbell.
Synopsis: Travel for 23 hours, get picked up by old mates, and drive up to the ski field to downhill ski.
Music: Cut Copy – "Future"
Middle Earth comes into view….Mt Cook didn’t want to be left behind.
Woody does his pre-skiing warm up with my new skis….
This guy checks my "lift ticket," at least, I hope that’s what he was looking for…
Woody makes his first EPIC turn down mid-winter-packed-powd3r….
…and then carves up Thanksgivings leftovers. Do they celebrate Thanksgiving here? In any case, he loves white meat.
Campbell, more of a water/paraglide sportsman, finds a pocket of fresh…
Quad-latte de losers….
666 schmears his way back into winter…
Then traverses over above Pipeline in the Alta Chutes…
NZphotoslave gets hella insane…
To which, 666 gets all ‘Pink Panther’ on his ass…
A we bit of a hike above Shadow Basin grants disgusting views….
This pic is so gross is should be labeled as NSFW…
Photoslavetothesystem finds a nice open field to make minimal turns…
A hike to the Alta Chutes gives you Southern Aspect Kiwi Powder…and chutes.
A shirtless guy decides to make a horrible turn….oh well, he had good intentions, I guess.
Poster-child Woody, makes a beautiful ‘pre-carve’…
NZphotoslave earns winter exposed turns…
Woody on the Diagonalator hip….
This boarder probably had a little scare….
666 airs…for chips.
Mmmmm….EXTREME TERRAIN! Just like Australia mate!
No comment…
NZphotoslave is a slave for skiing…
But he’s actually a decent ski model….
On the way back down the mountain, a certain magazine caught the driver’s eye….
A typical kiwi family on a ski vacation…
To watch Campbell fly over the lake…
Kiwi-food…
Fun with pink….Remarkables in the background.
Yeay! My bed was waiting for me….
Checked out the venue for the qualifiers for the "big mountain" comp on tuesday. It may be a better use of my short trip to venture up to Canterbury for a few days and ski the country…